i’m a whiner. but i don’t just settle for the basic “but i can’t doooooooo this!” oh, no. i wrap my whine in a warm blanket of logic and self-analysis. “you see, it’s not that i don’t WANT to do this. i just can’t, BECAUSE….blahblahblah.” it’s like putting a grain of truth in a lie, and it makes the self-defeating sentiments all the harder to dispute.
one of the things i really respect about WW — and my group leader in particular — is that they don’t buy it. if you follow the rules and make sure you’re getting the right amounts of water, veggies, healthy oils, exercise, etc, you WILL lose weight. my leader is proof, the two ladies sitting in front of me in meetings are proof, heck, my little gold star from last week is proof. the website has a science section that systematically shoots down all those comforting excuses and myths and theories that justify “i can’t.”
i worry when my weight loss slows to a fraction of a pound. negative thoughts come flooding in. this was too good to be true…i should have known i couldn’t keep it going…fattyfatfatterson. and then i look at my weekly point tracker, and nooooo…it wasn’t genes, or big bones, or the phase of the moon. it was because over the course of 7 days, i drank 20 oz of water, instead of the recommended 3500. or i abandoned veggies. or i spent the whole time sitting on my ass. it’s trackable, and it’s explainable.
and that means it’s overcomable.
if i don’t achieve the goals i’ve set for myself, it will be because i just didn’t put in the requisite effort. it’s that simple…and that scary. as i type, i feel the chill breeze of accountability curling around me. i can’t blame this on other things or other people; the time for whining is over, and all my excuses have been shot down like skeet on a firing range. i’ve got the support; i’ve got the tools; the motivation is up to me.
motivation like looking at the ideal weight for my height/age, and realizing i’m 50lbs on the wrong side of that. at a pound or two a week, that’s such a long way from here. and yet, cliche, journey begins, cliche, single step, yadda, yadda, blah.
some people have an angel or a devil on their shoulder. i have doctor cox.